10 Questions to Ask Before Choosing a Christian Intensive — And How I Answer Them

When the stakes are high—whether you’re a parent seeking help for your child or a couple trying to heal from betrayal, addiction, or deep disconnection—you need more than good intentions. You need a process that’s proven, Spirit-led, and led by someone you can trust.

That’s why I encourage every caller I speak with to interview at least three providers before choosing who will guide their intensive. These are sacred spaces where vulnerability meets transformation, and choosing the right guide is foundational.

Below are 10 key questions I recommend you ask any potential coach or counselor—and how I personally answer them after more than 40 years of experience in Christ-centered coaching, recovery work, and spiritual formation.

1. How long have you been doing this kind of work?

I began offering intensives in July 2000 and have spent the decades since walking with individuals, couples, and families through deeply painful and complex seasons. My intensive format has been refined over time, shaped by real-world experience and anchored in Christian coaching and biblical counsel.

2. Have you worked with situations like ours?

Yes. I’ve helped:

• Parents facing issues like sextortion, digital exploitation, LGBT identity questions, and family estrangement

• Couples working through pornography addiction, infidelity, emotional disconnection, and betrayal trauma

• Individuals who feel spiritually stuck, emotionally reactive, or unsure how to move forward in faith

Each story is unique, but transformation begins when clients face the truth with courage, humility, and hope in Christ.

3. Will you include both parties in the process?

Yes—whether you're coming as a couple, a parent and child, or seeking help for yourself, the intensive is tailored to include the right voices at the right time.

• Couples: I work with both spouses individually and together. Healing often involves exploring painful dynamics with honesty, empathy, and accountability. Both partners are invited into that process with care and clarity.

• Parents and Children: When parents bring a teen or adult child, I include both parties as appropriate. While respecting the child’s autonomy and readiness, I also work directly with parents to restore connection, set grace-filled boundaries, and support lasting change. Your role is not only welcome—it’s essential.

Every intensive is personalized, and we’ll work together to determine how best to involve each participant for the greatest possible impact.

4. What does a successful outcome look like?

We’re not just aiming for better behavior—we’re pursuing heart transformation.
Success looks like:

• A teen or adult child beginning to walk in truth, take ownership, and reconnect with their God-given identity

• A couple rebuilding intimacy and trust with honesty, humility, and renewed covenant

• A parent or spouse finding clarity, confidence, and peace—even if the other person isn't ready to change yet

This process is not quick-fix coaching. It’s a Spirit-guided path toward renewal and reconciliation.

5. How does faith in God factor into this process?

Everything I do is Christ-centered.
Healing isn’t just emotional — it’s spiritual, psychological, behavioral, and relational.
We draw deeply from Scripture, invite the Holy Spirit into the process, and move at a pace that honors each person’s readiness. My goal is to help clients realign their hearts with the truth and grace of God in every area of life.

6. Do you offer remote intensives?

Yes. I offer intensives:

• In person in Altamonte Springs, Florida (at the Airbnb of your choice)

• Remotely over Zoom™

Many clients choose the remote format because it’s private, convenient, and effective—especially when travel or discretion is important.

7. Is this coaching or counseling?

I offer Christian coaching, informed by clinical insight and grounded in a biblical worldview.
Coaching is about moving forward. It’s action-oriented and Spirit-led. Together, we’ll identify what’s broken, imagine what’s possible, and take courageous, practical steps toward healing—with truth, accountability, and grace.

8. Is this about behavior change or heart change?

It’s about heart change.
Surface changes fade. Real change takes place below the surface, which is why I developed the Icebergology™ Model—a nine-step process that helps clients explore:

• Reactive behaviors

• Distorted thoughts

• Damaged emotions

• Deceitful desires

From there, we move into transformation: divine desire, healing emotions, renewed thoughts, and responsive behaviors that reflect a new identity in Christ.

9. What does the investment include?

Your one-time investment in a 4-day intensive offers more than just time together — it provides a robust, Christ-centered framework for lasting growth. Here’s what’s included:

• A comprehensive intake process to clarify your needs, define goals, and prepare for breakthrough

• Four 4-hour coaching sessions (Tuesday–Friday), tailored to your situation

• Evening video teachings and reflection assignments to deepen daily insight

• Homework on the 9 Steps of Icebergology™, guiding emotional, spiritual, and behavioral transformation

• Four hours of aftercare coaching, scheduled in flexible 30-, 60-, or 90-minute sessions

• A personalized Peace Plan, inspired by Psalm 12:20, to help you walk forward in healing—across heart, mind, body, and relationships

• Weekly live virtual office hours for 26 weeks, beginning the week you reserve your intensive. These sessions allow you to ask questions, receive encouragement, and engage the process before and after your intensive. Most clients begin the intensive 2–3 weeks after booking, so this ensures you never feel alone while you wait.

• Bonus: 26-week audiovisual discipleship and recovery curriculum — You’ll receive access to a members-only section of my website, where weekly video teachings build on the Icebergology™ Model and introduce multifaceted strategies for long-term spiritual formation and life transformation.

10. What does the 4-day intensive look like?

Here’s a basic structure:

• Days 1 & 2 – Discovery
  We uncover what’s beneath the surface—exploring root causes, core wounds, and emotional patterns.

• Days 3 & 4 – Recovery
  We shift toward ownership, vision, and Spirit-led change. We address habits, communication, relational dynamics, and practical next steps.

Each evening includes brief video teachings and reflection work. The week ends with a Peace Plan to help guide your next season of growth with confidence and clarity.

📍 Learn more or schedule a free discovery call at: https://www.icebergology.com/pages/appointments
📱 Let’s talk when you’re ready.
Text me at Seven-One-Nine / Four-Four-Zero / Four-Eight-Nine-Three.
I spell it out to keep the robots from signing up for intensives. They’re not ready for Icebergology™ just yet. 😄